I have a theory about relationships. I believe that there are many people in this world who think that all of their problems and insecurities will be resolved once they're in a romantic relationship. Because from the outside, people who are in relationships look like they are so happy. The media portrays love to be so magical, perfect and sexy. But the reality is this: relationships are hard. They require so much more than the physical attraction and maybe the soulful connection. It is the honesty of the communication between the couple that governs the status of their relationship. Relationships are mirrors, they show you your problems and insecurities. They show what is holding you back from being completely happy and at peace with yourself and with your life. Marianne Williamson said: "When you meet anyone, remember it is a holy encounter. As you see him, you will see yourself. As you treat him, you will treat yourself. As you think of him, you will think of yourself. Never forget this, for in him you will find yourself or lose yourself." Women, especially, think that they will feel beautiful, loved and cherished once they find a man. This is never the case. If you don't feel this on your own, chances are you won't feel it authentically. You can only attract someone who is in resonance to the degree of your self-perception. To say this in simpler terms: you attract what you believe you are, not what you want. If you think that you are wonderful, smart, amazing and bona fide, you will attract someone like that in your life. As it says in The Perks of Being a Wallflower, "we accept the love we think we deserve." So fix your thinking before you try to fix someone else. Better yet, fix your self-perception before you decide to date someone. The truth is, you are good enough. You are. But if you don't think that, very few people will. We teach people how to treat us based upon our self-perception. If someone is treating you with disrespect, it may reflect the resonance of the relationship you have with yourself and with God. Marianne Williamson also said, " Our self-perception determines our behavior. If we think we're small, limited, inadequate creatures, then we tend to behave that way, and the energy we radiate reflects those thoughts no matter what we do. If we think we're magnificent creatures with an infinite abundance of love and power to give, then we tend to behave that way. Once again, the energy around us reflects our state of awareness."
My personal mantra: Men like women who like themselves.